Turtles All The Way Down~

"It would be unfair for me to say 'I love you too' when you didn't even say it in the first place, right?"

Today is Friday. That means...so many things. It means one of my friends is back in town, alone time with someone special, a confession of feelings, drinking, reading a good book, enjoying the sun, house shopping, and fantastic conversation.

A beautiful morning. A simple day. A day this brilliant can only have a magnificent end, and so far, it has yet to disappoint

This morning was...I'm having a hard time finding the word for it. All the words in my mind seem too corny. But whenever I search for something else, the same dumb ass words come up. I'll come back to it.

Anyway, after that I cut my hair (fucking finally!) but my clippers broke. And so I used some glue so I could finish the job and will invest in a new set before I leave. My hair was WAY too long this time, so I think I need to cut it more often. Although, it had just started to curl up, which is odd. Every other week I will just have to give myself a haircut. u______u

I relaxed in the sun for a bit today, and looked at my brother's new house. It's a mess right now because people are moving out, but hopefully they hurry up so that can be gutted. I told him I'd help him if they started before I left. As long as spiders aren't involved....

As much as I talk bad about my family, I love them. Makes the situation that much worse.

Hmmmm...Family reunion tomorrow. My mother's side. Which means the women get to work and the men get to slack off and get drunk! I hate my mother's side just for that. Men eat first. Men don't clean up. Men get to drink. Men don't talk to the women. Seriously? The 1920's want their mentality back.

Then I have the trip to Allegany in August, and my dad's first adoptive family's reunion. My birthday is also quickly approaching. And I'm asking for nothing for my birthday since it wont matter anyway since I'm leaving pretty soon after that. My friends want to take me to some festival in Syracuse. Don't know if I'll go or not.

Decisions decisions.

"Shopped" for clothes and shoes. I saw these cute high heels. But decided against it. I'll indulge my interest in fashion when I'm in the Air Force. I'm already running out of money in the bank, which means I have to ask my parents to help me. Which I'm dreading! Maybe I'll tell them that's my birthday present. My dad will be pleased.

I'm hoping my grandmother isn't throwing me a party for going to basic and graduation. Oh yes, this is my first time writing about my Associates in here. I got it! I cried. I felt like such a big baby. My dad just hugged me and kept saying "Good job." I'm pretty sure he was crying too, even if he wont admit it. I'll admit it. I cried, dammit! After all that shit Angel dragged me through at Daemen it was a huge "FUCK YOU!" to receive it. Fuck you, bitch. You can't keep me from being happy.

Went off on a completely different topic. Right!

Great day. Greeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat morning. Fucking fantastic morning. It made all those other extremely shitty mornings worthwhile. And for those two hours, I loved me and all that I was. Despite all the other bullshit going on in my life, I felt (I hate this word) blessed to be me. But not in a "God loves me~" way just in a "really really happy, this is gonna make me cry happy tears" kind of way.

So I thank you for that.

Really.
Truly.
Thank you.