August 20

A,

I thought I would never have to write this letter. Prayed this day would never come. And here I am, tears streaming down my face, my eyes red from crying, and my fingers numb as I struggle to breathe. How do I even begin?

It wasn't long, the time we spent together. But as fleeting as it was, it meant the world to me. The things you taught me....the things you brought out of me...

You showed me it was alright to trust again. Not everyone is there to hurt me, use me, abuse me. I told you the things I had never told anyone, and you locked them up like it was the most delicate of diamonds. Loved me uncontrollably and stayed with me no matter what.

Towards the end, things were rough but you pushed through it with me. You never stopped standing by my side even as the waters became very uneasy.

We both tested each other. Pressing to see how far we could go. As we shoved against the other's boundaries, we learned more about each other. The more we learned, the more we cared for one another.

I dropped my masks for you. Crushing them under my feet so that I wouldn't have to worry about them ever again. You made me work harder to become the best person I could be. And when I reached up to remove my last mask, I hesitated. In that single action, I lost you.

And when I lost you, my world fell apart.

The pieces are so scattered I worry I may never get them back again. Cutting myself as I try to pick them up, only to drop them again. I need your help to put myself back together.

I wish I could hold you again. Talk to you again. Apologize.

I wish I could wake up to you and this was all a dream.

Oh, how I wish...

Very lonely and very hurt,
Shelly